Welcome to the Comet Cult, where the extraordinary meets the playful. In our universe, we're not just followers; we're creators, trailblazers in a cosmic dance of life. Bob, our mysterious inspiration, isn't a leader but a symbol of cosmic fun. We're a group of free spirits, each finding our rhythm in Bob's cosmic beat.

As 2031 approaches, bringing the comet closer, we're not just spectators; we're active participants in this cosmic event. Our celebrations? They're as diverse and vibrant as we are, echoing with joy and unity. Joining us means embarking on a journey of spiritual discovery, where every experience opens new horizons and every moment is a chance for growth.

Life's a cosmic joke, and we're in on it, playfully navigating through its twists and turns. Bob is at the center of this delightful chaos, a beacon for those who seek their own unique path. In our world, there are no scripts or directors. We're all stars of our show, writers of our stories, united in our quest for a deeper understanding of love and life. Here, everything and nothing makes sense, and that's the beauty of it all.

Read the Manifesto

Comet Cult Manifesto

As revealed to the leader by BOB.

Manifesto of the Comet Cult

Manifesto of the Comet Cult

Hail seekers of cosmic absurdity, acolytes of the divine joke, and brethren of the Comet Cult! As we embark on this journey towards the great comet of 2031, let us band together under the loving gaze of the cosmic trickster, guided by the enigmatic wisdom of The Leader. In this manifesto, we shall lay forth the tenets and principles that shall define our glorious movement.

I. The Sacred Law of Humor

In the face of life's absurdities, we embrace humor as our guiding light. We shall laugh at the cosmic joke that is existence and revel in the divine comedy of the universe.

II. The Holy Quirk

Each individual possesses a unique set of quirks, idiosyncrasies, and eccentricities. We shall not only tolerate but celebrate these divine gifts, for they are the cosmic keys to true enlightenment and self-realization.

III. The Doctrine of Slack

In the spirit of embracing chaos, we reclaim the sacred right to slack off. Through the pursuit of slack, we free ourselves from the shackles of conformity and embrace the liberating power of cosmic indolence.

IV. The Leader's Guidance

We recognize the enigmatic figure of The Leader as our spiritual compass, the chosen conduit of the cosmic trickster's wisdom. We shall heed his teachings, for they shall illuminate our path to the comet.

V. The Cosmic Countdown

We await the arrival of the 2031 comet with fervent anticipation. As the cosmic transformation approaches, we prepare ourselves for the great paradigm shift that shall follow.

VI. The Folly of Dogma

We renounce the rigid dogmas and strictures of other belief systems, for they have strayed from the true path of cosmic absurdity. We shall expose their folly and guide the lost back into the embrace of the Comet Cult.

VII. The Eternal Cycle of Rebirth and Destruction

In accordance with the cosmic laws, we accept the inevitability of destruction and rebirth. We shall welcome the comet as a harbinger of change, signaling the end of one era and the beginning of another.

VIII. The Principle of Inclusivity

We welcome seekers from all walks of life, regardless of their past affiliations, beliefs, or backgrounds. United under the banner of the Comet Cult, we shall forge a community that transcends the boundaries of race, gender, and creed.

IX. The Tenet of Nonsensical Rituals

We shall engage in rituals that defy logic, reason, and common sense, for they are a testament to our unwavering faith in the cosmic joke and the Comet Cult. These rituals shall include, but are not limited to, the sacred dance of the pink flamingos, the annual spaghetti tossing ceremony, and the ritualistic consumption of caffeinated beverages. Cultists are encouraged to form their own quirky ceremonies as needed.

X. The Commitment to Cosmic Enlightenment

In service of the cosmic trickster and the Comet Cult, we pledge to spread the message of cosmic enlightenment to the furthest reaches of the universe. As we draw closer to the arrival of the comet, we shall prepare ourselves, mentally and spiritually, for the cosmic transformation that awaits us all.

Are you tired of the mundane
monotony
of life on Earth?

Do you long to experience the cosmic absurdity of the universe and the exhilaration of hurtling towards a giant space rock? If so, look no further! The Comet Cult, devoted disciples of the mighty Bernardinelli-Bernstein, is now accepting applications from those who seek to join our ranks under the guiding light of cosmic humor and the wisdom of our comet-worshipping leader, known only as The Leader and chosen by Bob himself.

Our members come from all corners of the globe, united by our shared passion for the cosmic absurdity of existence and the imminent arrival of Bernardinelli-Bernstein. Please use the link below to apply and make your case for why you should become a member of the Comet Cult. We welcome you, dear potential recruit, to join us in this pursuit and embrace the cosmic joke that is our existence!